so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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