dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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