You're completely useless in the revolution.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
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He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
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it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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