she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Randomize
