they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize