ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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