I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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