i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
