you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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