CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Randomize