is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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