I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
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