Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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