Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Randomize
