Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Randomize
