the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
