Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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