I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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