I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
