He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Randomize