she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
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