i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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