So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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