but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
