trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Randomize
