I will die if light touches me.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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