The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
