IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
