He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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