I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
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