I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
