cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
