the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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