let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
