HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Randomize
