you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Come see our sink grown plant.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Randomize
