Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
We need to get me chipped asap
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
