do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
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