Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I just found a bag of teeth...
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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