dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize