Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
