After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Randomize
