Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
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