how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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