Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
