Dual....:-)
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Randomize
