It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
