He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
