Are we in a gay sports bar?
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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