I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
