I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
